Wow it. Has been overs year since the tragedy changed my family forever. Forgiveness isn't easy when n one asks for you to forgive them. Thankfully god has blessed me and helped me to forgive even tho I don't feel like it. But some days my hear still seems raw and shredded in pieces. With a brother in prison and family you no longer know at all life Dosent feel easy, just sad. I fear of being hurt though so I don't look back I fear of instability of introducing retaliation ships in and out of my babies lives so I don't call. Brokenness is evident when you receive no anniversary phone call and no card nor phone call for Christmas, birthday or any holiday. Then again I don't think I ever got those anyways. Pain is real when people widely post to Facebook about loving their family and being grateful for time spent with them.i haven't seen my brother in almost a year and since he will serve another 13 before release I probaly will never see him again.i love him As I do my entire family and I have forgiven their mistakes however my heart is to fragile to break again.